-
The Weirdest Coincidence I’ve Ever Experienced
People sometimes ask me this question at readings. What’s the strangest thing that’s ever happened to you, the kind of moment that makes you wonder if the universe is paying closer attention than we give it credit for? I used to give a polite, forgettable answer. Then I’d go home and think about the real…
-
Why
A common question asked of many subjects. Today I’m busy asking myself – why? Why am I so sad? Why do I feel depressed? Where did this “woe is me” come from? Why can’t I have that, do that, feel that? Why did I do the things I did when I was young? Why do…
-
Inventory
The Adam’s apple in old photographs,a hard comma in the throat’s soft sentence. Shoulders built for a doorwayyou never meant to walk through. The particular wrongness of a swimsuit,size medium, women’s,purchased with shaking handsand worn like a confession. A binder’s compression at 6 a.m.,ribs remembering all daywhat they were flattened for. The five-o’clock shadowrising like…
-
A Library in My Pocket
There is a moment every morning before the world begins making demands of me. The coffee is still too hot to drink. The house hasn’t quite decided whether it wants to be awake. Outside, Florida is already stretching toward another humid day, but inside there is only silence—the kind of silence that feels earned. I…
-
To My Past Self, Who Thought This Would Never Happen
EXCERPT FROM MY BOOK:Love, Me: Letters I Wrote When I Wanted to Disappear Oh, sweetheart.You had no idea, did you? You believed if you just did everything right—if you stayed quiet, stayed useful, stayed small—you’d be safe.You thought faithfulness guaranteed protection.That God would step in.That love would win.That if you were good enough, obedient enough,…
-
Reading an Authentic Tale
As someone who has walked with the Lord for three decades, navigated profound personal transitions, and treasures music as a form of emotional expression, I am drawn to stories that explore identity, transformation, and resilience. Recently, I found myself captivated by the prospect of reading “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle, a book that feels tailor-made for someone like…
-
My Name Means…
My name is Ava. It’s a small word, yet it carries a world of meaning. Names have always held power, shaping identities and bridging the gap between who we are and how others perceive us. For me, Ava is more than just a name; it is a declaration of authenticity, a symbol of transformation, and…
-
What’s In A Name?
Ava sat cross-legged on her bed, surrounded by scattered pieces of paper. Each one bore names; some were hastily scribbled, while others were written in flowing script with careful strokes. She had been grappling with this decision for weeks—a name that felt so simple yet carried the weight of her entire identity. She had grown…
-
Communication as Connection
Communication is at the heart of who I am. It’s more than just exchanging words; it’s about connecting with others in genuine, thoughtful, and transformative ways. I’ve spent a lifetime cultivating a style of communication that blends authenticity, empathy, and creativity—a reflection of my journey and the person I continue to become. I’ve always believed…
-
A Message from Ava
The billboard should read: Live Authentically, Love Fully, Dream Boldly Hello, friend. I’m Ava, and this is my heart speaking to yours. Life is a journey—not a straight line, not a predictable map, but a masterpiece in the making. Along the way, we’re called to be more than just passengers. We’re creators, dreamers, and storytellers.…
-
Pondering the Past and Future
As I walk this journey of becoming my truest self, I often find myself caught between the past and the future. Both exert a pull on me, shaping my thoughts, emotions, and sense of who I am. They aren’t opposites as much as they are two halves of the same whole—a complex, evolving story that…
-
University for Ava
Attending the University of Nebraska as a CIS-gender male while internally navigating the realities of being a transgender woman likely brought Ava both moments of joy and significant challenges. College is often a pivotal time for self-discovery, growth, and identity exploration; for Ava, these experiences may have been uniquely layered. In the predominantly conservative Midwest,…
-
Playtime: Courage, Curiosity, and the Joy of Being Me
Ava sat at her desk, gazing at the open calendar on her computer. Between her pastoral responsibilities and the whirlwind of planning meetings for the church’s new senior living facility, she rarely made time for herself. Tonight, however, was different. She’d circled the date weeks ago, committing to an evening that wasn’t about serving others…
-
Ava’s Top 5 Favorite Groceries: A Genderqueer Foodie’s Delight
As a vibrant, transitioning woman who finds joy in the small things, Ava sees grocery shopping as more than a routine—it’s a way to nourish body and soul. Here are five of her favorite grocery staples, which bring her comfort, energy, and a sense of connection to her most authentic self. First are fresh berries.…
-
Lessons From My Past
Ava stood before the mirror, her reflection a blend of who she was and who she was becoming. Past and present coexisted in the glass, like old friends sharing a knowing smile. It was strange but beautiful to recognize the strength in the person she had been before transitioning, to see him not as someone…
-
Courage To Live As Me
When I think of Ava, I think of courage—not the loud, brash kind, but the quiet, steady bravery it takes to change your life and risk everything to be true to yourself. Ava is a remarkable woman, but you must know where her story began to understand why. For years, she lived as someone the…
-
The Courage to Be Ava
Ava stood before the mirror, adjusting her scarf once more, feeling as though it was the hundredth time. Her hands trembled slightly, betraying the confidence she tried to summon. She had practiced her sermon several times, but this morning felt different. It wasn’t just about the words she would share; it was about who she…
-
Embracing Authenticity: A Journey to Confidence
Ava stood in front of the mirror, adjusting the pearl necklace she’d chosen for the evening. The reflection staring back was still new to her, an unfolding chapter of her journey post-transition. Tonight marked her first gala since publicly embracing her authentic self, and while she was confident in her choice of a sleek emerald…
-
Ava’s Holiday Table
The scent of orange zest, cinnamon, and cloves filled Ava’s mother’s kitchen, curling through the open windows into the brisk Autumn air. Holiday cooking had always been a family affair, and Ava was determined to keep the tradition alive this year despite the shifting dynamics. Her siblings were scattered across the country, and her parents…
-
Writing About Ava
If I Didn’t Need Sleep, I’d Write Stories About Ava. If sleep were no longer necessary, I’d spend those newfound hours weaving tales about Ava, a character who has been quietly residing in my imagination, waiting for her stories to unfold. Ava isn’t just a character; she’s a collection of contrasts—a thread that ties the…
-
Becoming Ava
A Journey of Fear, Anxiety, Excitement, and Change The idea of changing my name was not a fleeting thought. It simmered quietly in the back of my mind for years, like a whisper I wasn’t ready to hear. Whenever someone addressed me by my old name, I felt a slight pang of discomfort—a reminder that…
-
Awakening —A Short Story
Ava sat on the edge of her bed, the morning light filtering through the pale curtains of her small apartment. Her hands clutched a steaming cup of coffee, the warmth grounding her in a moment she hadn’t always been able to find. Today felt different. It wasn’t just the first day of spring—the first day…
G R A C H E K
Dee Grachek is an author and Presbyterian pastor whose work explores faith, authenticity, identity, and hope through fiction, memoir, and spiritual writing.
Drawing on a life of ministry and personal transformation, Dee writes emotionally honest stories that invite readers to discover grace, courage, belonging, and the enduring power of unconditional love.
Dee is passionate about helping others find the courage to live authentically and discover a God whose love is wider than our fears, with writing marked by emotional honesty, theological depth, and an abiding conviction that every person’s story matters.